As I began to learn the lesson of loving an adopted child just as much as one born to me, God began to change my attitude from merely an "acceptance" of my situation, to a beautiful embrace. Every fear I had, every doubt, was taken from me. God replaced doubt and fear with trust in Him and excitement for His plan. Although we faced much uncertainty, He imparted His grace to sustain us.
We began to consider the different avenues of adoption. After talking to other adoptive couples, we decided we wanted to work with an agency, but we weren't certain if we should adopt internationally or domestically. As we looked into international adoption we were completely overwhelmed by all of the obstacles that stood in our way. First of all, the price seemed insurmountable. Secondly, many countries required a long stay in-country to finalize the adoption. We began to worry, how would we afford this? would Blaine's job even allow him to take time off? At that point, we began to shy away from international adoption because it just seemed "too hard." So, we looked into domestic adoption. I will take a moment and be perfectly honest with you, I was sold on this idea because I could get a baby... not even just a baby, but a newborn baby. Next, we learned of domestic adoption through Catholic Charities. They offered newborn adoption and the fee would be based on a percentage of our income. We also learned that there was a government adoption tax credit that would completely cover the adoption expenses. I was so excited, I couldn't contain myself. I wanted a baby so incredibly badly, and this seemed to be the answer to my prayers. I was over the moon.
We met with a representative from Catholic Charities to find out more about their agency. After the meeting, we felt so strongly about everything that we filled out a pre-application within days of the meeting. We had finally begun our adoption journey. :)